The student becomes the master

I know I write mostly about Mad-hatter and autism, but I have other children. Children who are not affected by developmental disorders and delays. Children who go to school, learn things, do homework and then ask for my help on said homework… DUDE… Homework. I really thought I was done with that stuff. (sigh)

Gertrude is learning all sorts of ridiculous wonderful stuff that she will never use again need to be a capable adult. Unfortunately, we are now at the point where we must read a chapter in a text book and have her review our work before we can offer any assistance. I mean, seriously, what the heck is my third grader doing Algebra for? THIRD GRADE! ACK.

She is now officially smarter than I am. Maybe not in practice, in street knowledge or common sense (DEFINATELY not in cleaning… If you open her door too far the rats might get out), but book smarts? She is kicking my hiney. I was in “Eagle” classes throughout my school career. I thought I knew everything important.. Really, I did (think that, not know everything). She shows me everyday how wrong I was.

For example, third grade in our city raises baby chicks from fertilization to early chickhood (or whatever it’s called, I’ll be sure to ask smarta$$ later). She has been talking about these baby chicks non-stop for weeks. Who was a yolker, who was a quitter (BTW, not very nice, egg cycle naming people!), who was pipping, etc.

Anywho, I decided it would be a good idea to make some egg salad the other night… Do you see where this is going? Yeah.. She was..displeased. Crying ensues. Tears, horror, drama…blah blah blah. I get her calmed down and explain, in her terms, that these eggs are yolkers. They never met the Rooster and aren’t baby chicks yet. She calmed down, and everything was LA DI DA wonderful.

She is watching me peel the boiled eggs, and probably hearing me say some bad words ( I hate peeling eggs, really I do). She comments on the “egg membrane” giving me some trouble.. Yeah, AMEN sister! Stupid egg membranes. I finally get this one egg down to just a tiny bit of shell. I rip that piece off, and a whole chunk of the egg white comes off with it… Of course it does. Why wouldn’t it. Gertrude looks at me and says

“You have some Albumen on you finger.”

AAAARRRRGGG.. What are you fifty? Go watch some iCarly or something would ya? I think I will seal her up in tupperware tonight to keep her young. She really needs to quit this growing up crap.


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